Ted Cruz Accuses Rivals Of Cannibalism

Funny story written by XRhonda Speaks

Tuesday, 16 February 2016

image for Ted Cruz Accuses Rivals Of Cannibalism
A Ted Cruz super pac suggests his opponents have participated In "unspeakable crimes."

Saying the New York Times reported it first, the Cruz campaign was distancing itself from a mailer a Cruz super pac sent out to Nevada voters describing his opponent's practices of ritual sacrifices and cannibalism.

"It was a mistake to tell voters that GOP candidates were cannibals," Cruz said to a group of reporters outside of Al's Pack-n-Go Pizza in Reno NV. "But it really doesn't matter if Marco Rubio and Donald Trump were literally eating each other or not, the point is how they are destroying the Republican party."

Not so fast says his main rival Donald Trump: The Don, along with others, have rightly pointed out the suspicious timing of the mailer, just before Nevada's primaries.

"Ted and his pacs needs to be sued for this kind of dishonesty," Trump said, "and frankly his Nevada delegates should be re-allocated to me and the other honest candidates."

The New York Times report in question was actually an Op-Ed piece by conservative columnist Charles Krauthammer.

Talking about the Cruz campaign claims he said, "A seventh grader reading my column would understand that I was not literally accusing the GOP of eating people."

Taunting, Krauthammer goes on, "In fact, Mr. Cruz, my seventh grade grandson, who is interested in politics, is looking for a job in a national campaign."

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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