Republican House Committee On Benghazi Elects Hillary Clinton President

Funny story written by K.C. Bell

Monday, 26 October 2015

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"Thanks, Republicans!"

Wow! Not exactly their intention, but the Republican House Committee on Benghazi managed to present Hillary Clinton, the former Secretary of State and US Senator from New York, as knowledgeable, accurate, professional and presidential; clearly, not their initial intention.

"We're just going after her to knock down her poll numbers," confessed House member Kevin McCarthy.

Lands sake, does that mean they really didn't care about Benghazi? The $8 million dollar hearing was just about destroying a female, Democratic candidate for the White House?

Who'd of thought?

One House member from the great state of Alabama directed her questioning at former Secretary of State Clinton as though the secretary were a self-confessed car-bomber, whose car bomb failed to detonate. The angry tone and facial expression of the House member could give a Kalashnikov rifle competition.

Would the same gentle lady from Alabama use the same tone and facial expression when shopping at Walmart and asking for directions to the adult diaper section?

Switching into action, the store public address system would bellow: "Mayday, mayday. A water fall is about to rupture from the, the, whatever…"

When questioned whether Secretary Clinton remained home alone on the night of Benghazi or if she had a midnight caller, Mrs. Clinton burst out laughing with her usual trademark cackle.

"Do you think that's funny?" the Kalashnikov snapped. "Four people died that night!"

Everyone is aware of the history, but Kalashnikov implied a footnote: Did some guy visit you after hours? And is this going to be my gotcha moment? And I can be a contender for Speaker of the House? That Pelosi woman made it, so why oh why can't I?

There were no mid-night visitors.

The mean spirited tone by the Republican committee members lasted eleven hours concluding with no strikes, no fouls, no walks, and no errors by Secretary Clinton, and costing taxpayers approximately $8 million dollars.

$8 million dollars could have provided additional protection for the American Consulate in Benghazi. When Hillary Clinton requested additional funds before the Benghazi attack, the Republican majority voted a resounding no.

Does Kalashnikov think that's funny?

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The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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