CSI, Bones - Ideal For Slimmers Says Diet Expert

Funny story written by Ellis Ian Fields

Thursday, 9 June 2011

image for CSI, Bones - Ideal For Slimmers Says Diet Expert

Watching police forensic procedural dramas will help you shed the pounds says a top slimming expert.

The claim follows months of research involving hundreds of subjects using different diets and exercise regimes.

Dr Milicent Gruel, head of Foodie Studies at Maidenhead University said: "Many of the diets out there have dubious results and we certainly do not advise people to follow regimes that make you stick to one food group or another.

"But I stumbled across a sure-fire method for weight loss during our studies - I was about to tuck into a nice pilaf one night when Bones came on... someone dug up a body covered in maggots... it put me right off.

"So our advice is: plan to sit down to dinner when an episode of something like Bones or CSI is about to begin. Shortly into the programme you're bound to be presented with the image of a disgustingly decomposed cadaver or a gruesome murder.

"If you can carry on eating after that you must have a cast-iron stomach."

Dr Gruel added that despite the fact that, contrary to popular opinion, episodes of these programmes were not aired every night there was a simple solution.

"Keep a load of episodes backed up on your Sky Plus box or buy the box sets. You'll be thin as rake in weeks."

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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