Public drinking ban extended in London

Written by Steddyeddy

Monday, 25 August 2008


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The sign invented for London by Mary Nomates

Hot on the heels of the drinking ban imposed on tubes and buses in London by the Mayor of London, the City of London council have taken it one step further by enforcing a drinking ban in all the city's pubs.

From next month, it will be illegal to drink alcohol in any of the city's hundreds of pubs.

Mary Nomates, the Chairwoman of LAAL, the London Anti-Alcohol League, was said to be delighted.

"I have been campaigning for an end to alcohol every since my best friend Mary Whitehouse died. I am proud to never having ever touched alcohol myself, so I know all about the evils of the demon drink, just like dear Mary knew all about the depraved sex shows and pornographic films she never saw.

"I see this ban as a major contribution to a reduction in drunkedness on the streets. Nearly all pubs in London without exception serve alcohol, and the sooner this is brought to an end, the better for the people who drink, get drunk and then go and eat Vindaloo curries.

"I think it is disgraceful that successive governments have allowed pubs to serve alcohol for all these years."

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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