The Royal Shit Reader has looked into the Royal toilet bowl after King Charles had a burrito tsunami blow out of ass … and the future of Britain does not look good.
Sir Reginald Pooh (born into his job) inspected the King’s shit after His Majesty left the polished white shitter, and said,
“Hmm, no, no, no, I don’t like this one bit. Is that a peanut? Oh my, things do not bode well for Avalon. You see that swirl of brown there … possibly gravy, figgy pudding, or a toenail accidently swallowed … well that says this whole Brexit thing is going to stagnate Britain for the next 50 years. And that chunk of undigested broccoli … war is afoot! And that scrape of carrot? Immigration issues shall plague the indigenous Britons. One can only hope His Highness will eat less red meat and drive-thru onion rings, and more fish and grains for softer stool and greater movement frequency. However, there may be a light at the end of the chocolate tunnel. If the King can full relax his bowels, then perhaps the fate of Fair Britannia can still be changed to more favorable winds to sail. And enough with the bloody burritos! We defeated the Spanish Armada … or did we, if we’re eating their food and it forecasts evil for our empire once through the Golden Goose. Why must history constantly repeat itself?”
Indeed … and the Royal Witch Doctor has yet to give his full report … once he finishes his dance around the bonfire and finds a better ox tail to shake, then we should have even more fascinating “science” of divination of the British Isles.
