Passwords Are Trapping Civilization

Funny story written by K.C. Bell

Saturday, 4 March 2023

image for Passwords Are Trapping Civilization
"I need my coffee! What was my Social Security number?""

You can’t even order a morning cup of coffee delivered from Peet’s without a password. The password is the missing link between a horrible morning and a, “Thank you, God!” kind of day.

And what was that password?

Concentrating on a password becomes even more challenging if you are desperate for coffee. That kitchen coffee pot begins to look even more convenient. But that kitchen coffee pot can't make vanilla foam. The memory of drinking that lovely, comforting, good-morning coffee topped with vanilla foam, lingers.

Ordering a delivery of morning coffee becomes even more challenging when passwords demand one upper-case letter and a number. Added to this memory exercise, the password also requires a punctuation mark!

What is that Peet’s password? Needy? $leepy? 2Desper@te? Wake&up?

Good luck trying to remember which punctuation mark goes where at 6 in the morning!

While civilization works to recall complete passwords, the order screen then announces: TOO LATE, TIMES UP! START AGAIN.

Start again is the order of the day. Civilization is trapped. And just for the luxury of a delivered cup of coffee. With that yummy vanilla foam.

But that’s just the password for morning coffee. What about passwords required for credit cards, banking, water bill, airlines, health records, Google, Netflix, Amazon, AT&T, Vermont Village Store, etc.?

Why not use a Social Security number with a capital letter & a punctuation mark? Using one's Social Security number with a capital letter and a punctuation mark as their universal password would work for everyone.

Thank goodness 911 doesn’t require a passwords.

Read more by this author:

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

Do you dream of being a comedy news writer? Click here to be a writer!

Comedy spoof news topics



Mailing List

Get Spoof News in your email inbox!

Subscribe…
Go to top
readers are online right now!
Globey, The Spoof's mascot

We use cookies to give you the best experience, this includes cookies from third party websites and advertisers.

Continue ? Find out more