Teenager buys all of the Valentine's cards

Funny story written by Ben Macnair

Sunday, 29 January 2023

image for Teenager buys all of the Valentine's cards
Valentine cards, yesterday

Teenager Thomas Johnson has bought all of the Valentine's cards from Chutney on The Fritz's Post Office, the only place in the village that sells them so that for a change the town's least eligible bachelor Brian Asshat won't be able to.

'I thought, that for a change I would have at least one card to send to Sarah this year' explained Thomas 'Now I just have to decide which of the 16 ones I will send her'.

'There are 13 really cliched ones that I won't send, but of the other three I don't know which one to send, and then what do I write in them? How do I profess my feelings to Sarah, she is absolutely lovely'.

Sarah said 'Honestly, it would just make a change not to have a card from Brian this year, and Thomas is just great. I wish he would just ask me out. I am turning down older boys in the sixth form for him'.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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