Idiot Gavin Williamson, a part-time shoplifter was said to be confused after seeing a self-help section in a book-shop.
Already confused by everyone else for the government minister, this Williamson was so confused by the bookshelf that he put back all the books he had hidden in his jacket, and left the shop.
'Yes,' he told us, not realising that the confession was not the best idea he had ever had 'I know that taking from shops is frowned upon, that is why I do it, but when it said Self-Help, I thought maybe they were giving them away, and so I just left. I don't know why I take the books either, I never read them, and they just gather dust and regret on my bookshelf.'
