Family Has Lost All Track Of Time During Virus Lockdown

Funny story written by Monkey Woods

Wednesday, 29 April 2020

image for Family Has Lost All Track Of Time During Virus Lockdown
Both were able to agree it was still 2020

A family of four who, like everybody else in Britain, have been enduring the Coronavirus lockdown with mounting frustration and irritation, have now been able to add 'confusion' to that list, after admitting to the fact that they had lost all track of time.

Myke Woodson, 56, lives with his wife and two children in Oaf-on-Sea, and had been trying, manfully, to come to terms with the unprecedented stay-at-home arrangements imposed upon the public by the government.

They've been watching a lot of TV; listening to music; playing various children's games, such as Ludo, Spirograph, KerPlunk, Mousetrap, Monopoly, Totopoly, Twister and Battling Tops; drawing pictures and coloring them; and defacing pictures in old magazines.

Yesterday, however, Mrs Woodson told her husband that they would all be having steak and kidney pie, with mashed potatoes, carrots, and peas for their tea on Thursday, to which he replied:

"TODAY is Thursday!"

"No," she replied, "today is Wednesday!"

A discussion, about what day it was, ensued.

A calendar was consulted, and it emerged that it was Tuesday, and both of them were incorrect.

Mr. Woodson said later:

"It just shows you how disorienting this lockdown is! Little does she know it, but I almost said it was Sunday, because it seemed so quiet!"

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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