Court Rules Parliament To Be Closed For Forty Years

Written by T. Loaf

Wednesday, 18 September 2019

image for Court Rules Parliament To Be Closed For Forty Years
Time for a break....

After hearing cases for and against prorogation of the British Parliament, the Supreme Court of the United Kingdom has now ruled that Parliament be adjourned for the next forty years. The upcoming session is to commence on 1 April 2059. MPs were somewhat stunned by the decision, which will mean they have very little to do in the coming months other than listen to their constituents.

"Not very fulfilling," explained one MP who, of course, wished to remain anonymous. "Boring lot. Haven't spoken to them in years. I'll miss the shiny green benches, so good for sliding on, and slouching..ooh..do you think that's given me away...?"

Boris Johnson meanwhile accepted the move sportingly. "However, I may extend or apply for another prorogation once we re-commence in 2059. You can't trust Parliament. I'm the ony realist around here....."

The Right Honourable Lord Wilson of Culworth, Justice of the Supreme Court, stated that matters had to cool down. "We're giving everyone breathing space. Who knows what life will be like in forty years' time? Having seen and listened to debates in recent weeks, I think we can do without such claptrap for a while, don't you? Of course you do..."

Her Majesty Queen Elizabeth II welcomed the development, and congratulated the judges on their finding. "Wigs are always so inspirational", she beamed. "especially periwigs. I think I'll get William one for Christmas."

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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