Bread Was Mouldy

Written by Monkey Woods

Wednesday, 29 May 2019

image for Bread Was Mouldy
Those dicky birds won't mind a bit of cladosporium!

A loaf of bread that had been stored in a bread bin and forgotten about for two weeks, had turned 'mouldy', it's been revealed.

The bread, which was an 800g medium-sliced Granary loaf, had been purchased on or around Saturday, 4 May, at Tesco, and placed in the bread bin at the home of Mrs Val Kenwood, 82, of Hull, East Yorkshire.

Not having as good a memory as she used to have, say, 10 years ago, and having other things on her mind, Mrs Kenwood soon forgot about the bread, and only remembered it when a leaflet came through her letterbox advertising products at Lidl .

She immediately went over to the bread bin to check on the status of the loaf, and was horrified to discover that it was now almost inedible. She tried scraping the mould off the bread with a sharp knife, but ended up dismantling what was left of the filthy, disgusting mess, and tearing it up into very small pieces, which she then threw out for the birds.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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