The Dangers of Sucking Disco Balls

Written by C/L

Friday, 10 May 2019

image for The Dangers of Sucking Disco Balls
Too many people have given in to "sucking balls" - disco balls, that is.

A disco ball is a roughly spherical object that reflects light directed at it in many directions, producing a complex display. What are now usually called "disco balls" were first widely used in nightclubs in the 1920s. (source: Wikipedia - Disco ball)

Unfortunately it's not all "Ah, ha, ha, huh, staying alive"! That spherical orb of glitter that got people out on the dance floor of discotheques in the 1970s and beyond, has really been an evil source of vile inspiration.

Too many people have given in to "sucking balls" - disco balls, that is. Sucking up the bedazzling speckles of shimmering light instigates infantile thoughts in the minds of so many shallow dimwits to want to engage in sexually embarrassing dancing, similar to the spastic, death convulsions of a huge flock of tragically-hip birds.

These mesmerizing orbs of debauchery also drive idiots into restrooms to snort cocaine off of sink counters, and engage in the most disgusting sex acts possible. A veritable smorgasbord of stiff and swollen genitalia, contorted limbs, embarrassing positions, grunting, groaning, sweating, humping, and banging.

Disco balls also make macho people very edgy. Creating an atmosphere of pumped-up egos and touchy innuendos. It inevitably leads to the coup de gras of the evening, violence out in the parking lot, in the alleyways, and the ice cream parlor across the street that stays open 24 hours.

Yes, people suck balls, disco balls! They suck in its tragic-magic that fuels their futureless, dead-end lives.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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