Tartare Sauce Had Reached Its Expiry Date 'Some Time Ago'

Written by Monkey Woods

Saturday, 11 May 2019

image for Tartare Sauce Had Reached Its Expiry Date 'Some Time Ago'
Tartare sauce always looks 'a bit dodgy', to be honest

There are some meals that are just not the same without their sauces, and fish and chips is one of these, but when one diner went to add his tartare sauce to his fish, he found something rather unappetising waiting for him.

Moys Kenwood, 55, a fish-lover, opened his jar of Colman's Tartare Sauce on Wednesday, full of expectation, his mouth already watering at the thought of the delights that lay therein. He hadn't tasted the tangy, creamy-white-colored addition for some time, and was visibly enthusiastic about the prospect.

Alas, trouble was in store.

As he twisted the lid on the jar and removed it, an odor reminiscent of something very nasty escaped from the container and into his nostrils. He peered inside, and saw that the sauce had started to grow.

This was bad news.

Despite the lack of a label displaying the product information, Kenwood realized that the sauce must have reached its expiry date.

Grasping at straws, he scraped the green seaweed-like skin from what used to be the sauce, and looked again. It was no use, the pong was extreme, and the contents had to be placed in a plastic bag, which was tied-up, and then launched into the back garden, where a fire will take place, soon.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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