In a clever deception that has fooled the world for decades Prime Minister Tony Blair revealed that not only was Margaret Thatcher's death a hoax but that he, Blair WAS in fact Mrs Thatcher .. in disguise. "And a very clever disguise it is Sir" one unnamed House of Commons Commoner pointed out before this week's Westminster brawl with the House of Lords started.
"Don't ask me how they bloody did it" Blair told a baffled Parliament admitting "I myself sometimes don't know if I want to open the lavatory door with the gent smoking a pipe on it or the one with a picture of the Queen in her knickers."
Scotland Yard, concerned about the deception immediately authorized their crack "Grave-Digger" grave digging unit to go "Dig up Margaret" to settle the matter once and for all. One digger on the team told reporters,
"We dug the grave, found the coffin, pried open the lid only to find 170 pounds of Figgy Pudding. Apparently Mrs Thatcher was NOT in the grave just as Mr Blair said. I never knew she was dead but I don't keep up with the Tele much after they canceled Bean."
When all parties finally took a moment to think about it they remembered that Mrs Thatcher was in fact NOT dead and that there never WAS a funeral Tony Blair (Thatcher) explained,
"Now THERE, there's your fallacy. The current Mrs Thatcher (me, Tony) died (not really) without your knowledge as Mrs Thatcher years ago to prevent that bloody Nuclear war from starting with Toronto. After the aliens landed in '84 Parliament thought it best that Mrs Thatcher (me) pretend to be dead while simultaneously cosmetically creating a male counterpart of herself (Tony, Me) to rule over our great land. It's kind of difficult to explain without slides. You just have to trust me. Tony. Margaret. Can I leave now?"
Doctor's at the Tower of London Home for the Mentally Insane told the Prime Minister "no" but promised him/her that if he/her finished his/her broth they would let her/him go out and play with the Sparrows for a tad.
