Tampax, Florida - (Ass Mess): Poor old cash-strapped Cherie is having to flog off the Blair family holiday video nasties on an internet auction site in a bid to stump up the cash to pay for their latest holiday jaunt at the home of 70s crooner Robin Gibb after the Parliamentary Commissioner for freebies and perks ruled the Florida trip a gross violation of taxpayers' money.
The auction site has declined to give a preview of the ten minutes unexpurgated footage and is maintaining a low profile on reports that it features unusually intimate holiday frolicking with a number of large Alsatian guard dogs during their afternoon siesta time at the Tampax Beach hideaway.
The bids are expected to start rolling just as soon as additional footage of the Gibbs' New Year's Eve Bal Masquee is ready to be included which, rumours say, feature Tony Blair in his Gary Glitter costume and Cherie dressed as Mata Hari with a lotus blossom sewn into her embonpoint (ouch!).
All proceeds are expected to go straight to the Blairs' blind trust portfolio, that little Necker-registered slush fund managed by Prime Monsterial Middle East Envoy Lord 'Cash Point' Levy.
