Russian mafia boss Vladimir Putin has today declared that he is going to "fix" Turkey and Russia's relationship. He made the statement from a balcony overlooking thousands of Moscovites....Moscowellians....people in Moscow queuing up for a loaf of bread.
The relationship fix would see Russia return all of Turkey's ACDC CD's and Turkey allowing Russia to see their dog twice a month again.
After Turkey shot down a Russian bomber that was flying in it's airspace Moscow had imposed a number of trade sanctions on Turkey.
This included not allowing Russian package tours to operate to the country. Luckily now though Istanbul can once again welcome groups of vodka swilling, CSKA Moscow fans shouting racist abuse on their streets.
President Erdogan of Turkey said:
"Mr Putin called after the attempted coup and congratulated me on surviving. Apparently he had placed a rather large bet on me getting through alive. I'm grateful that he had so much faith in me."
