In a shock announcement this morning God announced his resignation over the outcome of the UK General Election in which David Cameron was reelected with an overall majority.
An angel appeared in our offices this morning with the announcement, where a statement was read out from a scroll. "For thousands of years it was believed that God was all knowing, all seeing and all powerful but in recent months the Devil together with Lynton Crosby and Rupert Murdoch have ganged up and despite God's best efforts David Cameron was reelected. God apologizes to all the faithful followers who have worshipped him over the centuries but now the time has come to move on and seek his replacement.'
Different religious leaders are currently holding talks over how to elect his replacement but it is believed that both Iain Duncan Smith and Tony Blair are interested in replacing him.