The newly formed "Apathy" party which sprung up almost overnight via social networking websites came in for a slamming by David Cameron at a meeting of The Conservative Party in Scunthorpe Working Men's club last night. "Apathy is endemic in our political system. Its about time we ignored it and turned the other cheek." he said.
The new party has drawn the interest of Lib Dem members, Tories and Labour groups. No voting as such will be needed to elect members of parliament, just pre-signed affidavits that voters who can't be bothered to vote or do anything else will be assumed to have voted "Can't be bothered" or Apathy to give it its correct name. Winning candidates will be selected by their high degree of disinterest in politics
The apathy system seems to suit many people who have become disillusioned with having to do something. Many people think that doing nothing is a statement in itself and they quote well respected people like Ghandi who often simply sat down when confronted by overwhelming opposition forces. No-one in the Apathy Party can be bothered to formulate policy at the moment or attend meetings, which followers say is the intrinsic beauty of the system. "It can't fail", said a couch potato this morning, "The Conservatives have done "naff all" since they formed a coalition and Nickle Egg just winds people up. We can do that. Its what we do."