Labour shadow cabinet minister apologises for spray painting a phallic symbol on a Rochester voter's wall and tweeting a photo of it

Written by Anne of Cleavage

Friday, 21 November 2014

image for Labour shadow cabinet minister apologises for spray painting a phallic symbol on a Rochester voter's wall and tweeting a photo of it
Happy shark - looks a bit like a phallus when viewed side on

Labour front bencher Seely Kau today expressed "regret for any offence I may have caused" after tweeting a photograph she had taken of a Rochester UKIP voter's house on which she had spray painted a phallus.

Ms Kau, who lives in a £3 million house but rides a bicycle to work because she wants people to think she supports the environment, denied that she had drawn a phallic symbol on the voter's wall, insisting it was a "happy shark with his mouth closed".

She said that while cycling past the house, she had noticed that there were three union jacks on the walls, so she decided to paint a picture of St George and the Dragon. Except the didn't know how to paint St George and didn't know how to paint a dragon, so she decided to paint a shark instead because that was easy. She happened to have a can of spray paint on the back of her bike and thought she had better use it up before the paint went bad.

She accepted that some people might confuse her shark for a phallus and that her stunt could be misinterpreted as public school snobbery, so she was resigning from the shadow cabinet. She added that she expected to be re-appointed to the shadow cabinet next week, "when all the hoo-ha has died down".

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

Do you dream of being a comedy news writer? Click here to be a writer!

Spoof news topics



Mailing List

Get Spoof News in your email inbox!

Go to top
readers are online right now!
Globey, The Spoof's mascot

We use cookies to give you the best experience, this includes cookies from third party websites and advertisers.

Continue ? Find out more