LOUISVILLE, Kentucky - (Sports Satire) - History was made at this year's Kentucky Derby, when a late-entering horse named "Rich Strike" surprised the entire thoroughbred racing world and won the coveted 148th Run For The Roses.
"Rich Strike," a brown and lavender-colored horse is owned by Rich and Margarita Dawson, a loving rich couple, who also own lots of shares of Kentucky Fried Chicken, Diet Dr. Pepper, Loretta May's Diet Mint Juleps, and Legos.
The horse was going to originally be named "Sea Biscuit," but the name was changed due to legal reasons.
The winning purse amounted to $13.7 million, which is a derby record, surprising last year's winning purse of $1.1 million.
Venezuelan jockey Sonny "El Chiquito" Leon, who lives with his wife, Lolita, and their 11 children in the tiny fishing village of Cartelville, replied after the race "Dees little muchacho ease so proud as punch tu be dee racing jockey guy who roded dis mucho, mucho queek-running caballo. Rich Strike beated a bunsh of berry, berry fast horseys."
"Rich Strike" is trained by Eric Reed, who has also trained some other fast-as-hell horses including "Fast Betty," "Fast Felix," and "Fast Giddy-Upper."
