Sky Sports have announced plans to include racist, homophobic, sexualized and other hateful slurs to enliven viewers' experiences, starting with next weekend's Premier League football broadcasts.
"Our research uncovered strong viewer demand for an enhanced level of aggression," said VP of Programming, Kyle Lawrence following today's goalless draw between Manchester United and Chelsea. "Fans feel the game is dominated by technology like VAR, and our early attempts at artificial crowd noise made the sport seem too sanitized. They want more emotion, so we're going to provide that."
Liverpudlian Kate Davies said she misses the spectacle of grown adults screaming and making monkey gestures at Jesse Lingard for 90 minutes, and hopes artificial heckling lets her "relive the feeling of him crying inside."
Sussex native Joel Taylor longs to see opposing players cower when taking a corner at Craven Cottage. "I used to love watching crowds swear in unison and spit at Leighton Baines as he stood behind the ball. Simulated profanity will help me get through this horrible year."
Guardian user Dick Hertz said he's missed hearing "have you ever 'ad a Gooner up yer arse" yelled at Sian Massey-Ellis, the EPL's lone female referee and mother of three, and plans to take part in Sky Sports' Fan Engagement initiative by sending them his own list of humiliating taunts.