MADRID – (Sports Satire) – Spain’s national news agency Las Pelotas is reporting that the nation’s greatest matador, Joaquin Beauregard Gazpacho, has been gored in Madrid’s Eva Longoria Bullring.
Las Pelotas stated that El Gazpacho, was momentarily distracted when a flock of Canadian Geese flew over the bullring.
And, in that split second, the bull, named El Pinche Toro Numero 13, caught the superstar matador on his left rodilla (knee).
The beloved bullfighter instantly fell to the sand, and quickly put the bubble gum he was chewing on the horn scratch, which quickly stopped the bleeding.
His bullfighting team picked him up and took him to the arena infirmary. Doctors treated him and informed the news media that El Gazpacho will have to wear a gauze patch for about 47 hours, but he is expected to be back in the bullring next week.
El Gazpacho wants all of his millions of fans to know that it was simply a flesh wound, and he is just grateful that he did not get gored in his genitals.
His stunningly sexy wife, Esmeralda, 38-24-36, was by his side, and she remarked in her Spanish accent, “Jes, dat wood have make me be mucho, mucho berry sad.”