NEW YORK CITY – A spokesman for the New York Yankees has stated that they have listened to the complaints of their southern fans, but the name will remain as it has been for 107 years, since 1913.
A group of southern Yankees fans submitted a petition with 904 names of Dixie residents, asking the team to change the name, since it is an insult to the Yanks fans who reside south of the Mason-Dixon line.
Long-time fan, Earl Merle Apricot, of Chattanooga, Tennessee, said that he wants the name changed to the Rebels.
He says that he will have to throw away about 7 sports shirts, a pair of Yanks boxer shorts, and a New York Yankees surfboard, but that’s fine with him.
He did mention that his wife, Emma Jo, who recently had breast implants, is ready, willing, and able to have her “Property of the Yanks” tattoo that she got on her fanny, four years ago, lasered off.
Another hard-core fan, who lives in Pascagoula, Mississippi, said that he is going to start cheering for the Houston Astros, even though they cheat. He then commented that, at least they have a southern name.
When told that Astros is not a southern name, he replied he knows that, but pointed out that the name Houston is a southern name.