Tom Brady Talks About His New Tampa Bay Team Mate Rob Gronkowski, Oranges, Hurricanes, and His Political Aspirations

Written by Abel Rodriguez

Monday, 11 May 2020

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Tom says that since moving down to Florida he'll eat as many as 10 oranges a day.

TAMPA BAY, Florida – Tom Brady recently spoke with Dottie Bazooka of Sports Balls Illustrated Magazine at his new Tampa Bay mansion, Casa Touchdown.

Brady told Miss Bazooka, that he and his sexy, svelte wife, Gisele Bundchen, have totally fallen in love with everything about the Sunshine State, except for jellyfish.

He added that his kids still cannot believe that there are orange trees on almost every corner.

When asked about getting to play with his old Patriots receiver, Rob Gronkowski, Tom stood up did a triple somersault, and said that he loves Gronk more than crocodiles love ducks.

The Tampa Bay Buccaneers quarterback noted that he has already received thousands of emails asking him to run for governor when he retires.

Miss Bazooka asked him if he has any political aspirations. He smiled and said that 73% of him does.

"And so how about the other 29%?" he was asked.

Brady grinned, and said “Ah, well, Zookie, the other 27% is kinda whispering for me to run for president in 2024.”

“Are you a Democrat or a Republican?" he was asked.

He paused for a moment, and replied, “Well, let’s just say that I’m a Unipitatarian.”

“Really?”

“Yes, really.”

[WRITER’S NOTE: I went in and Googled Unipitatarian and nothing came up.]

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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