Cristiano Ronaldo Wants To Play For Liverpool Next Season

Written by Monkey Woods

Sunday, 2 February 2020

image for Cristiano Ronaldo Wants To Play For Liverpool Next Season
Ronaldo in training with Juventus

The January transfer window closed at midnight on Friday, and will remain shut for the rest of the season, but already there is talk about what might happen in the summer, and the name that is on everyone's lips is that of Cristiano Ronaldo, and a possible move to Anfield.

Said Ronaldo:

"I never really wanted to play for Manchester United. My boyhood dream was to play for Liverpool, but they never came in to sign me, so I made do with United."

The 34-year-old Portugeezer has spent this season scoring a plethora of hat-tricks for Juventus in Italy, but, he says, he always wanted to play in front of the Kop for Liverpool as a boy, and would leap at the chance to join them now, in the twilight of his career.

But Reds' manager, J├╝rgen Klopp, was less than enthusiastic. He said:

"When we need a player that lies and cheats, falls down like a felled Canadian redwood at the drop of a hat, then rolls over and over and over across the turf, and tries to get opposition players sent off, we'll give him a call. Until then, we're fine, thanks."

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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