Rangers Remain (Stupid)

Written by Backandtotheleft

Sunday, 4 August 2019

Rangers manager, Steven Gerrard, today made the claim:

If all the matches had finished at the 86th minute last season, we’d have won the league. That’s the brutal truth.

Actually if all the games had finished on the 86th minute Celtic would have still won the league by a point but let’s not let facts get in the way of fantasy shall we.

Big mad Steve went onto state:

If every team in blue from Glasgow had been given a head start of 30 points then we’d have won the league as well. But how are we supposed to compete when the Scottish FA is so blatantly favouring other sides?

Other sides have often pondered similar absurd scenarios with Aberdeen famously claiming the Scottish title before a ball had even been kicked because they were top of the pile at the beginning of the year.

Who can forget the “March of Hearts” dossier that was presented to the FA asking for them to be awarded the Scottish cup because. “Any side named after a human body part should be awarded the Scottish cup”

Steven led his side to second place in the table last year and is looking to upstage Celtic in the forthcoming season. To do that he’ll actually have to prove himself as a manager rather than a fantasist.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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