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Funny satire stories about Glasgow Rangers

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Funny story: Football Gossip: Bale, Rangers and Jellied Eels

Football Gossip: Bale, Rangers and Jellied Eels

Gareth Bale has told his team-mates he doesn't care about manager Zinedine Zidane's treatment of him and intends to see out the remainder of his contract at Real Madrid. Bale says he will be happy to stay and 'play golf' if not selected to play as he...

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Funny story: Football Gossip: Mourinho Warning, Motherwell "Bawbag", Sol Campbell, (Kan)Ye West vs Frank Skinner

Football Gossip: Mourinho Warning, Motherwell "Bawbag", Sol Campbell, (Kan)Ye West vs Frank Skinner

Before their Champions League match against Young Boys, so-called Manchester United manager, Jose Mourinho, warned his players "if you can't cope with playing at Old Trafford, then go home and watch the match on TV, just like me". BBC Sport has re...

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Funny story: Football Gossip: Willian, Rangers, Jordan Nobbs, Liverpool, Mourinho Shock

Football Gossip: Willian, Rangers, Jordan Nobbs, Liverpool, Mourinho Shock

Barcelona have reopened transfer talks with representatives of Chelsea and Brazil winger Willian. Previous talks had collapsed over the player's desire to be known as "Will-I-An" on his shirt. After scoring Rangers' second goal at St Mirren on Sat...

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Funny story: Glasgow gangs to get protection money to keep oil rig pirates at bay

Glasgow gangs to get protection money to keep oil rig pirates at bay

Oligarch Alexei Salmon may become the new outright owner of Celtic and Rangers football clubs when the North Sea oil is divided up, Scotch gang leaders have announced. His oil rigs and any football clubs will have the "protection" of razor wieldi...

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Funny story: Football Gossip & comments 28th August 2012

Football Gossip & comments 28th August 2012

Joey Barton: My heart is already in Marseille. (BBC Sport) Who knew that Joey had a heart? Tweet from Gary Lineker, BBC Sport "Proper Sunday. Football, roast for lunch, bottle of Lynch Bages '86 and more football" No Walkers Crisps? Darren Bent helps with police probe as cop cousin 'stole cash from dead' (The Sun) His cousins name is PC Richard Bent. aka Dick Bent. Scottish Cup: Ran...

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Funny story: Football Gossip & comments 26th August 2012

Football Gossip & comments 26th August 2012

Liverpool striker Luis Suarez insists he has a nice side despite admitting he gets angry on the pitch. (The Guardian) And if you disagree with him, he'll bite your ****ing ear off! Tevez is my role model says Luis Suarez (Daily Star) Er yeah, that could be were your going wrong Luis. Balram Chainrai, the former Portsmouth owner, has submitted a new offer in a bid to buy the League One cl...

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Funny story: Football Gossip & comments (Scotland) 19th August 2012

Football Gossip & comments (Scotland) 19th August 2012

Liverpool's Scottish midfielder Charlie Adam has warned his club-mates to expect a hostile atmosphere when they visit Hearts in Thursday's Europa League tie. (Various) No need to worry about a Glasgow Kiss, but watch out for the Edinburgh Elbow.. Rangers crowd of 49,000 v East Stirlingshire in Scottish Division Three was 17,000 more than the combined attendances of the Scottish Premier Leag...

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Funny story: Football Gossip & comments (Scotland) 9th August 2012

Football Gossip & comments (Scotland) 9th August 2012

Champions League Qualifying Rd, 2nd Leg. HJK Helsinki 0 Celtic 2 Celtic win 4-1 on aggregate. I'm no expert on the Finnish alphabet, but I'd say there's no 'I' in the HJK team. Panathinaikos 3 Motherwell 0 Motherwell, playing in the CL at the expense of crisis club Rangers (currently enjoying a 100% record in the Scottish Communities Cup 1st round and Scottish Third Division) crash out 5...

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Funny story: Football Gossip & comments 18th July 2012

Football Gossip & comments 18th July 2012

(Various) Dundee are chosen, ahead of Dunfermline Athletic, to replace the old Rangers in the Scottish Premier League. I think Dumfermline think they've been dun! (Daily Mail) Midfielder Oscar, 20, has arrived in London with the Brazil Olympic squad and will have a medical ahead of his £25m move from Internacional to Chelsea. All they need now is Luca Toni and Golden Globe for a team w...

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Funny story: Football Gossip & comments 15th July 2012

Football Gossip & comments 15th July 2012

Arsenal's new signing Lukas Podolski has urged striker Robin van Persie to stay at the club after the Dutchman said he will not be signing a new Gunners contract. "Please don't go, please don't go, Rob I love you so, and I want you know" ... Kilmarnock manager Kenny Shiel has had to give up on re-signing his midfielder son, Dean, saying he does not have the money to bring in any additional pl...

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Funny story: Robin Van Persie to join Scottish Premier League

Robin Van Persie to join Scottish Premier League

Robin Van Persie caused ripples this week by revealing on his personal website that he would not be signing an extension to his Arsenal contract, and now details are emerging as to his whereabouts next season. RVP Stated that he is not happy with...

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Funny story: Rangers Merger Story A Hoax, Says Writer

Rangers Merger Story A Hoax, Says Writer

A story circulating the internet about a merger between the Scottish football giants Glasgow Rangers, and their Premier League namesakes, Queens Park Rangers, is a hoax, says the story's writer, me. The story, which appeared on satirical news webs...

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Funny story: Rangers To Merge With QPR

Rangers To Merge With QPR

In what is sure to be regarded as a radical step, Glasgow Rangers, the second-best football team in the whole of Scotland, are set to merge with the English Premier League side Queens Park Rangers. Rangers, the Scottish ones, are currently deeply...

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Funny story: Glasgow Rangers apply to the Welsh Premier League

Glasgow Rangers apply to the Welsh Premier League

Demoted and disgraced former Scottish Premier League winners, Glasgow Rangers, have applied to join the Welsh Premier League after being told that the only Scottish League that would accept them, was the Hebrides Third Division. "It's no good," sa...

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Funny story: Rangers to buy English team Bury and play League One Football in Glagsow

Rangers to buy English team Bury and play League One Football in Glagsow

Speculation was mounting last night that Scottish Premier League crisis club Rangers were looking to buy English league one club Bury and move the club 200 miles up to Glasgow, bringing English Football League fixtures to Scotland for the first time.

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Funny story: Celtic Board Advised to Say "No" to "The Rangers" Plea for Inclusion in SPL

Celtic Board Advised to Say "No" to "The Rangers" Plea for Inclusion in SPL

Celtic Football club have released a statement saying that they will probably have to say "No" to newly created football team "The Rangers" plea for inclusion in the Scottish Premier League. The decision came after the Celtic board got together a...

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Funny story: Rangers Sold on Ebay for £1! Craig Whyte Wash named as 'Private Seller'

Rangers Sold on Ebay for £1! Craig Whyte Wash named as 'Private Seller'

Glasgow: 'Private' sale of Rangers takes place on Ebay, Craig Whyte-Wash named. Private Seller has 'cloudy past' & negative Feedback from previous sales. Buyers Beware!. Unclear at the moment who the buyer is. NTNON can exclusively reveal tha...

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