David Beckham Has More Points In The Last Month Than Manchester United

Written by Monkey Woods

Saturday, 11 May 2019

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A disappointing end to a disappointing season

Manchester United's disappointing season finally comes to a close this weekend, with the news that former player, David Beckham, has picked up more points in the last month than they have.

Beckham, 44, picked up six points at Bromley Magistrates Court in London last week, whilst, at Old Trafford, his old team have managed just five since their victory against Watford on 30 March.

United have managed to beat West Ham 2-1, drawn 1-1 against both Chelsea and relegated Huddersfield Town, and lost the rest

The former United and Real Madrid player was 'up before the judge' after being caught using his mobile phone whilst driving. He was also fined a tenth-of-a-second's wages, and banned from driving for six months, which is good news for taxi drivers and, possibly, chauffeurs.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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