Written by Monkey Woods

Sunday, 25 November 2018

image for Dallas Cowboys Cheerleaders Vow To Protect Border
Try getting past that!

As the seven migrant caravans move ever closer to the US/Mexico border, President Donald Trump received a major boost earlier today, when the Dallas Cowboys cheerleaders vowed to 'stand their ground' in the faces of the invaders, and to dance to the death.

Texas is known to be a target of two of the caravans, and residents along the border are showing signs of extreme nervousness. Gun shops have reported a 41% rise in handgun sales, and a 54% increase in those of rifles, in preparation for the imminent arrival of their unwanted guests.

But the Dallas cheerleaders are ready.

Captain Mitzi Snatchworth said in a statement, Sunday:

"My girls have been working hard, and we have a well-rehearsed routine to stop these bastards! We just want President Trump to know that he has our full and unconditional support."

Another of the team, Sofi Nibblit, agreed:

"President Trump and I already met several times and he should know that he can re-lie on me," adding, "anytime!"

And teenager, Tasha Plugg, enthused:

"I love the President! He can deep-end on me anytime of the day or night!"

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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