CCN (Crazy Cal News) - The "Internets" - President George W. Bush signed an order for the Drug Czar, John P. Walters, to crack down on hallucinogenic YouTube Videos.
"We kain't have peeple goin' around gettin' high legully. They need to be snortin' Cocaine to support thuh CIA like I do," said Bush. "We've gotta' crack down on these terreristic YouTubers that's gettin' high fer free. It's like legul LDS! Heck, I watched won video and it made me see colors and things, and all I can see normully is black and white like most dogs. It's as bad as them darn majik mushrumes ah used ta' kick outa thuh cow paties."
Mr. Walters is issuing bulletins to the FBI and CIA requesting that they either apprehend the posters of such videos, or destroy their computer with the dreaded CIA X11011 Virus which wipes out your hard drive so that it is non-restorable, burns out your monitor, and short circuits your power supply.
"If we can catch these evil drug pushers, we can throw them in our new dungeon now that we closed down Guantanamo," said Walters. "That's what punks like this deserve."
In response, angry YouTubers, who don't want to loose their free highs, posted a Wanted: Dead or Alive poster of President Bush for signing the order.
