White Cabbage Causes Volcanic Eruption in German Man's Belly

Funny story written by Jaggedone

Thursday, 23 September 2021

image for White Cabbage Causes Volcanic Eruption in German Man's Belly
One combustible explosion, is another man's combustible farts, both stink and can be deadly!

After observing a volcanic eruption on La Palma causing havoc on this wonderful island, a German housewife decided to have white cabbage for dinner, preceded by a boiling hot plate of leek soup!

Her husband Fritz Schmitz, who possesses quite a volatile intestinal system, but loves his missus's homemade cuisine, went for dinner big time! After devouring 2 plates of cabbage, and the bowl of leek soup, his wife, looked into his eyes and begun to wonder if this was quite the right thing to cook for her loving hubby?

Immediately after dinner, Fritz, entered WC and humungous noises bouncing around their ceramic bog commenced.

"Oh Mein Gott!' She thought, "He's erupting just like that volcano on La Palma!"

Things calmed down after Fritz's farts measured 6 on the Richter Scale. Later in the evening, whilst Fritz's missus was lying in bed reading 'Mein Kampf' he entered the bathroom, released a massive, combustible, red-hot fart, which shook the walls of the house, nearly gassed the missus, and released a poignant gassy pong all over the house.

"Fritz, from now on, no more cabbage, no more leek soup, and certainly no Brussels Sprouts! You are now on a diet of yoghurt, bananas, and mashed, milky potatoes, plus tonight you will be sleeping in the shed!"

In the interim, La Palma is being covered with lava, and Fritz's household is smothered by a cloud of pongy sulfuric-acid, a minor eruption, but just as effective, in smaller circles, as its 'Big Brother' on La Palma.

Scientists studying volcanoes, and men farting, have come to the conclusion, there is hardly any difference, it's just a matter of scale!

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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