US Congressman Matt Gaetz A Faithful Supporter Of Donald Trump

Funny story written by K.C. Bell

Saturday, 3 April 2021

image for US Congressman Matt Gaetz A Faithful Supporter Of Donald Trump
"See you later."

One thing's certain when Netflix makes Matt Gaetz's film in a year or two, knighted actor Sir Anthony Hopkins won't play the role. Too British! Yes, he performed as Picasso, Nixon, John Quincy Adams, Alfred Hitchcock, and Hannibal Lecter, but the Matt Gaetz role would be a bridge too far.

Matthew McConaughey could perform the role with peachy justice. Dye his hair ink black, have it flat ironed, let it grow five inches longer, give it the Elvis pompadour twist, poof, add a few baby fat pounds to his face, and McConaughey is in like Flynn.

Matt Gaetz’s in trouble. He says that if he pays for his date’s travel expenses, and his date might fly down from New York to Florida, and that even though she may cross a few state lines, that isn’t the same as sex trafficking.

Uh-huh. If she were under 18 years, it would be a crime punishable with life in prison.

Understandably, Gaetz went on to explain that if he were to pay for a date’s overnight expenses at a hotel, that isn’t the same as paying for prostitution. Oh no, no, no! He wants her to be comfortable. After all, she was his date! Where should she stay, in the street or a park?

He declined to explain any further, citing that it was Good Friday.

So though he respects the sanctity of Good Friday, it’s doubtful he still believes in the Easter Bunny.

Gaetz's political career is toast, a prison sentence looming, and no word of support from Mar-a-Lago.

Not even a tweet.

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The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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