Ways To Remove Trump From White House After Election

Funny story written by K.C. Bell

Tuesday, 25 August 2020

image for Ways To Remove Trump From White House After Election
"Add the anchovies."

Given that Donald Trump is going to lose another election - this time, not just the popular vote, but also the electoral vote - means he will no longer be able to remain in the White House.

He might insist on a job as a gardener, find a bank of fixed microphones, then announce something about a recount, “The greatest recount the world has ever known…”

Trump might say he’s still president and, “The election was rigged. The whole world wants me to stay as the real leader of the United States. Just ask Putin, Saudi Arabia, no one knows who’s in charge there, Rocket Man, the Chinese COVID-19 guy, and the sourpuss from Turkey.”

However, if he’s already out on the front lawn, the Secret Service can consider saying there’s a pizza delivery at the gate, and once he steps out to collect the pizza, slam the gate shut and lock it. He can have a ride in the pizza truck, eating pizza all the way to Andrews's Air Force Base. Then he'll take his last flight on Air Force One to Mar-a-Lago.

Or, instead of the pizza delivery truck, a firetruck. Claim that the White House is on fire. Tell Trump he’s taking a ride on the firetruck to Camp David. Instead, he'll be going to Andrews Air Force Base and to Air Force One. That will be his final flight on Air Force One to Mar-a-Lago.

Editor’s note: Think the pizza truck is the better choice. He can eat pizza all the way to Andrews. Does he like anchovies?

Reply: But the firetruck has a siren. He can play with the fire siren to Andrews.

So, while future plans are still in the works, Trump is trying to sabotage the election by defunding the United States Postal Service. Best way? Appoint a crony head of the Postal Service. Trump's crony didn't even know the price of a stamp for a postcard!

Add the anchovies.

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The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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