BILLINGSGATE POST: On February 2, when the groundhog is said to come out of its hole at the end of hibernation, if the animal sees its shadow, it portends to six more weeks of winter weather.
Anthropomorphically speaking - which is an art form when used to ascribe political hacks such as Joe Biden with animal characteristics - that furry little creature be he.
Metaphorically speaking - Biden’s ability to hang by his tail for days, and his aversion to light - is more symbolic of a bat than a groundhog. But let’s not quibble over details.
When he reverted to an earlier time in our country, a time when lying, dog-faced, pony soldiers rode the Great Plains, it became apparent that Biden had perhaps seen one too many Groundhog days. Either that, or his brain was drained from hanging from his tail too long.
Was it a coincidence that he chose a running mate named Kamala? Could she be the dromedary of his dreams? One hump or two, my dear?
Slim: “Where is the Doctor going with this?”
Dirty: “Yo, Dude. You got me. I never got past Algebra.”