LOS ANGELES - (Satire News) - The word on the streets of Tinsel Town is that the racist pussy grabber divorced Marla Maples in 1999, with intentions of marrying Ivanka Trump (yes his OWN daughter).
This incestuous revelation was uncovered by information guru Andy Cohen working with a secret operative for the CIA.
Trump's personal attorney, Segundo Juarez, informed his client (The Vietnam draft dodger) that if he did marry Ivanka, it would pretty much end his building, construction business.
The horny liar (DJT) told Juarez, that he did not give a damn, and that he would go down to West Virginia, where marrying a family member (i.e. sister, aunt, daughter, niece is perfectly legal).
SIDENOTE: Cohen reports that Ivanka was so upset at the sickening thought of marrying her own father that she showed him some nude pictures of him and she threatened to sell them to the National Enquirer.
