The Fox News Woman Who Thought She Would Be The Next Mrs. Donald Trump Got An Effen Rude Awakening

Funny story written by Abel Rodriguez

Friday, 9 December 2022

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"Bartiromo has the personality of sawdust." -ANN COULTER

MANHATTAN - (Satire News) - GOP Gushings News writer Jimbo Zoopy writes that an employee at Fox News has gotten the surprise of her 55-year-old life.

Maria Sandia Bartiromo told Zoopy that the only reason why she even paid any attention to the ass wipe (Trump) was because he used to flatter her with such flattering comments as telling her she looked like a Victoria's Secret model, and that she had long, sexy legs, and that she could correctly pronounce the names of all the US state capitals except for the capital of Florida, which is Tallahassee.

Maria actually thought that she would one day become El Donaldo's fourth wife, but she soon found out that all he wanted from her was her praise, her support, her encouragement, and a little nookie. ■

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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