Kimberly Guilfoyle Denies Ever Dating Mobster Pistachio Goombalini

Funny story written by Abel Rodriguez

Monday, 15 August 2022

image for Kimberly Guilfoyle Denies Ever Dating Mobster Pistachio Goombalini
"Wow! Kimmy has a mouth that was made for giving you-know-whats." -DONALD TRUMP

LOS ANGELES - (Satire News) - LaLaLand Daily has just uncovered photos of Donald Trump Jr's, fiancee Kimberly "Lips of Love" Guilfoyle parked at the La Brea Tar Pits in Los Angeles sitting in a 2023 Lamborghini with none other than Pistachio Goombalini, who is a member of the 10-brother Brooklyn Goombalini Crime Family.

When Guilfoyle was asked about the very revealing photos Kimmy said that she has never been to the La Brea Tar Pits and added that she has never ever met Pistachio Goombalini.

Guilfoyle did admit to knowing three of Pistachio's brothers Salvatore, Stromboli, and Giuseppe, but she insisted that she does not know, nor has she ever met Pistachio.

LaLaLand Daily reporter Macadamia Honeysuckle replied "Damnit girl, you sound EXACTLY like your racist predatorial father-in-law-to-be Don The Con.

Guilfoyle thought for a moment and asked, "Maca is Pistachio the one with the huge salami?"

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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