A List of 10 Nicknames That Fit The Hate-Spewing, White T-Shirt Wearing Simon Cowell To a Tee

Funny story written by Abel Rodriguez

Saturday, 6 August 2022

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"I really and truly believe that Prince Charles would make a great replacement for PM Boris Johnson." -SIMON COWELL

LONDON - (Satire News) - The American TV news show Tittle Tattle Tonight has compiled a list of names that have been used to describe the British television personality, music entrepreneur, record producer, Simon Cowell.

Cowell is the creator of such TV competition shows as "The X-Factor," "American Idol," "The X-Factor UK," and his most recent show "Guess The Color of The Underwear That I'm Wearing."

The 62-year-old, who was once linked to Paula Abdul and Jessica Simpson in the scandalous affair, known as "The Tinsel Town Menage-a-Trois Coupling," at times has been the most hated individual on both sides of the pond.

One British tabloid even named him "The Adolf Hitler of The Entertainment Industry."


1. The Sultan of Sarcasm

2. The Viceroy of Venom

3. The Royal Rude Dude

4. The Prince of Put Downs

5. The Captain of Cutting Remarks

6. The Baron of Bitterness

7. The Duke of Disdain

8. The Count of Cruelty

9. The Knight of Nastiness

10. The British Bulldog

NOTE: Simon recently told British information guru, Piers Morgan, that he owns 273 T-Shirts. This list was compiled by TTT's Pico de Gallo with assistance from Cheryl Cole, Prince Charles, Sofia Vergara. and Bernie Taupin.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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