Justin Time for A New Vaccine

Funny story written by Ana Sian

Sunday, 12 June 2022

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Now we all know that Covid is just an elaborate scheme by Freemasons and the Satanic Illuminati to bring the world to its knees. And, yes, China wanted membership, so they had to do something uniquely evil in order to impress the New World Order, to get in big with those who REALLY control the world ...

... but you bastards have gone too far when you freeze half of Justin Bieber’s face!

Put it this way: if I want the government to do something for me, like renew my driver’s license, give me a hunky tax refund, or give me a grant so that I can improve my interpretive dance routine, I have to wait and wait and wait, and even then, the Gov will grill me as to why I feel I deserve their money (my taxes, dammit!) for my awesome dance routine.

Why the interrogation when I just want to dance, dance, dance the night away?

So how in the hell did the Gov get themselves a vaccine for Covid, test it to make sure it wouldn’t have adverse side effects on – not rabbits or mice – but humans, then ship it out and have everyone jabbed in record time?

(In an aside, I whisper: I know I can’t say any of this without being branded a conspiracy non-believer who is obviously crazy ... but let’s just pretend I’m asking questions ... that’s all, just questions, Gov. ... any answer will do.)

First: the polio vaccine is an actual vaccine. You get one shot and you’re good for life – no polio. No strains, no monkey polio, no boosters needed. Go home and enjoy your life.

Second: different strains require more “vaccines” and booster shots? Long ago, in the 1990s, there was a saying: “No means no”. It referred to women who didn’t want to get raped. Could you imagine such a thing? Now, she just needs to lie back and think of England and let the Gov penetrate her body with as many steel needles as it deems she needs to be a good healthy girl. Here’s a lollipop. Now smile and say thank you, Mr. Gov, for injecting me with something you rushed into development. If I complain, call me a criminal; if I call you a criminal, you call me insane. It’s a wonderful snake that eats its own tail, innit?

Third: many people have reported bizarre side effects which they had no predisposition to get before they got the Gov’s raping needle. A LOT of side effects. I’m waiting for someone to report a third ear growing out of their foreheads, maybe psychic ability (I think I got that one), or the diminished mental capacity on par with, say, Ted Nugent or Ted Cruz or possibly anyone named Ted. (Wouldn’t that be weird? That’s my point.)

So why is Justin’s face paralysed on one side? Did he get the needle? He was a celebrity, damn you! You can screw with the common man or woman or child – but not a celebrity! If Robert DeNiro votes Republican – that’s it! If Denzel Washington is seen with a t-shit displaying the Confederate flag – ah hell no you didn’t! If Susan Sarandon drinks bleach to cure something, or if Bill Maher turns into a neo-Conservative with his bias worn on his Versace suit sleeve– oh shit ... too late for some.

Hopefully Bieber comes back from his frozen face, but if not ... whom do we blame?

The Illuminati are more anonymous than Anonymous. (And isn’t it interesting that it was founded in 1776 ... in Bavaria, not the Thirteen Colonies, but still ...)

(I realize that by writing this I may actually be suffering some weird reaction to the vaccine ... right-wings flying inside my brain – craziness may also be a side-effect.)

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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