Contrary to rumors and sight of moving vans at Mar-a-Lago, as well as the FOR SALE sign on the front lawn, Donald Trump is not moving to Slovenia. While Slovenia is his 3rd wife's birthplace, Trump can't speak the language.
Though reputed to be a true food lover, Donald Trump also can't open a restaurant. He never learned to cook anything except maybe what is sometimes known as the books..
Possibly, he could open a Starbucks or Peet's coffee house in Slovenia if he could ever master the steamed milk attachment. Forget ordering anything like a Peppermint, white-chocolate, mocha, Frappuccino, blended drink with ice. That will never happen. All orders would have to be for coffee, black.
Returning to his original job, Trump could open a real estate office. Even though he can't speak the language, maybe he could work something out with pictures and pantomime. He managed just great in front of MAGA crowds. He could sell them anything.
Unfortunately, Donald Trump can't just retire to a golf course in Slovenia. All assets will go to lawyer's fees, unpaid back taxes, and he has to keep Melania in Christian Louboutin's shoes. There are no film rights possible for the picture book Trump published. But he is old enough to apply for Social Security and Medicare. Or Obamacare.
President Biden could appoint Donald Trump as Ambassador to Slovenia with best wishes. Trump would have the Ambassador's Residence. Melania could be his translator. First task? Start selling MSGA hats and holding rallies.
History might repeat itself, but it would be in far-off Slovenia this time.
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