MANHATTAN – (Satire News) – The Cloud 9 News Agency reveals that the rumors of Melania Trump and Russian President Vladimir Putin having an affair are in fact true.
C9 writer Lexi Asapen, stated that she spoke with the nation’s number one information guru, Andy Cohen, who did in fact, verify that the two did engage in some illicit illicting on several occasions (7 perhaps 8).
At first both Putin and Donald Trump’s hot, sizzling wife denied it, but after Cohen spoke to Melly’s gynecologist, the truth came out.
President Putin is still denying it, but Melania just smiles from ear-to-ear when asked about it.
The soon-to-be-ex-wife of Donald Jonathan Erasmus Trump said back in October that Vlady, as she calls him, merely got to 1st base.
Then in mid-December, she remarked that he had gotten to 2nd base.
And then in early January, she commented that he had actually made it to 3rd base, and now it has come out that the Russian leader has hit several homeruns.
SIDENOTE: Melania is 51, Vladimir is 69, and the ‘Pussy Grabber’ (DJT) is 87.
