LOS ANGELES – (Satire News) – The Scuttlebutt Review has confirmed that disgraced former Golfer-In-Chief, Donald Trump, has in fact reached out to liberal lawyer Gloria Allred of California.
SR reporter April Jiggle, remarked that since Trump is widely noted for never paying anyone for any type of services, including electricians, plumbers, campaign advisors, attorneys, and prostitutes, no one, literally no one, will take him on as a client.
Trump's sexy wife, Melania confided to her BFF, LeBron James, that Donaldo is so damn desperate that he is seeking the legal services of one of the nation’s most hardcore Democrats.
Meanwhile, when Ms. Allred was asked if she will defend Trump, she took a sip of her avocado margarita, and said that she would not defend the evil, hate-spewing racist if he offered to pay her $25 million in cash, which the orange bitch grabber would never do.■
