SAN FRANCISCO – (Satire News) – The former resident of the White House, DJT, a person who spent more time on the damn golf course than horny rabbits spend having coitus has finally admitted something that everyone already knew.
Speaking with reporter Stormy Coin, of The Daily Dirt News Agency, the Trumptard finally, finally, finally admitted that he takes total responsibility for egging on his home-grown “Trumpian Terrorists” to attack the United States Capitol Building.
Miss Coin, who by the way greatly resembles Trump spanker, Stormy Daniels, asked “Don The Con” why he just now, over 9 months later, decided to come clean and tell the truth.
The man whose complexion makes an orange look pale, pouched out his lying lips and said that he gives all the credit to his wife Melania.
He then took two bites out of his Big Mac, ate 7 McFries, and remarked that Melly flat out told him that if he did not tell the truth about the attack on the Capitol, she would never again let him have any p**sy.
PROOFREADER'S NOTE: It’s truly amazing the tremendous power that a woman’s hooha (vagina) has, ain’t it?
