WASHINGTON, D.C. – (Satire News) – A close friend of Donald Trump says that the racist-monger is fit-to-be-tied.
The friend, who would only reveal the last digit of his social security number; 6, said that just as iRumors has reported, 15-year-old Barron Trump, is in fact, dating a 19-year-old high school senior whose name is Quantaneesha Apple.
DJT checked out Quani’s background, and he learned that she is 98% African-American, 1.5% Black Dutch, and .5% Cambodian.
Ivanka says that she thinks her half-brother dating a black girl is cute. Eric says Barron is immature, Donald Jr., says his father may end up disinheriting him, and Melania said that she and her BFF LeBron James think it’s neat.
The Sports Bet Gazette is reporting that LeBron wants to give Barron and Quantaneesha baskeball lessons.
Meanwhile in other Trump Family News. Don Jr’s., girlfriend, Kimberly Guilfoyle, who is Puerto Rican, has agreed to film a commercial for Tia Pia’s Tortillas.