DETROIT – (Satire News) – PornHub, the lasciviously pornographic video-sharing website, has just confirmed that the world’s two riches billionaires, Elon Musk and Jeff Bezos, want to purchase the extremely profitable site.
PornHub owners Zetta and Betta Verazino, who are both divorced, have informed the news media that the amount of members keeps increasing by leaps and bounds.
Zetta, who once worked as a Hooters’ girl, and Betta, who was once married to King Fasuli Allah of Dubai, are simply shocked at how their little old raw sex website has become so popular.
Musk said that he will spend whatever it takes to purchase the hot sex entity that Melania Trump has called "Dee bestest sexy and nasty ting dat I has eber seen."
Meanwhile, Bezos told iRumors that if he has to sell all of his shares in the Detroit Lions, the Cleveland Cavaliers, and Victoria's Secret, to get his hands on PornHub, he'll do it quicker than it takes a flea to pee.
The Verazino sisters say that PornHub, according to CNN's Anderson Cooper, has just become even more popular than Coca Cola, Taylor Swift, and nipple rings.
Betta said, tongue-in-cheek, that people would be shocked-as-hell to know exactly how many so-called evangelical Iowans and Kansans are charter members of PornHub.
Zetta confirmed that some of their most famous members include Lindsey Graham, Michael Lindell (the My Pillow guy), Ted Cruz, and all four members of the Trumpapalooza Ass-Kickin’ Band.
