DETROIT – (Satire News) – The company that owns the Porn Hub website, Raging Libido, Inc., is thrilled to announce that the amount of users has increased by a whopping 815%.
Adele Mizzen, a spokeswoman for the porn site, told the news media that the tremendous increase is due to so many millions of people sheltering-in-place, self-isolating, self-distancing, and simply getting into hardcore porn big time.
She pointed out that Porn Hub has increased its business by 31%.
Miss Mizzen remarked that she was glad to make a big announcement. She divulged that Porn Hub wants everyone to know that every customer will be receiving a 50% discount on their purchases between now and Christmas.
Raging Libido was founded in 2009 by the Verazino sisters, Zetta and Betta, with a $2,000 loan from the 1st Carburetor Bank of Detroit.
The sisters are proud to say that they have customers in 191 countries. They add that they are a bit disappointed that they have zero customers in Honduras, due to the fact that just about everyone in the Central American country is Catholic.
