William Barr Locked Out Of White House Parking Space

Funny story written by K.C. Bell

Saturday, 24 October 2020

image for William Barr Locked Out Of White House Parking Space
William Barr backing away from White House gate.

Driving down Pennsylvania Avenue in his red Ferrari, Attorney General William Barr turned into the White House driveway. As usual, he used his car’s La Cucaracha trumpet to alert the guard to open the gate.

The gate didn’t open. He was waved to a stop, and told he no longer had a parking space up at the White House.

Barr reminded the guard that he was the Attorney General, and he had an appointment with Donald Trump. The guard said he knew exactly who he was, but that he no longer had a parking space up at the White House parking lot. Orders from upstairs. He would have to park on the street.

The Attorney General insisted that no one parks a Ferrari on the street. Besides, there are protestors out there, and they would egg his car.

The guard agreed, adding that protestors might do more than just egg his car. Barr demanded to know who had taken away his parking privileges. “Was it the son-in-law?”

“No, further upstairs. He said he wanted you to arrest Joe Biden, or else. This is the 'or else'.”

“That prick!” Barr was reported to have screamed.

Backing away from the gate, he scraped a guard rail, and then hit a tree. Shifting forward, he hit the same guard rail again. The Cucaracha trumpet went off again.

“After all I’ve done for that elephant! I’ll issue an order restricting helicopters from landing on residential property. Let him waddle all the way down the driveway to Pennsylvania Avenue to board Marine One."

Driving away from the White House, the trumpet went off again.

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The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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