The BBC, long revered around the world for producing the most inane and pointless cookery shows, has announced yet another one.
The show will be along the lines of its headline "Masterchef" and "Saturday Kitchen" programmes, and will feature a bunch of braying morons pointing and shouting at a volunteer from the audience.
"It'll be full of massive hits," they announced. Or, at least, we think that's what they said.
There will be no requirement to be able to cook. In fact, the ability to boil an egg will automatically disqualify any applicant. The only entry requirements are an ability to talk utter rubbish at high volume whilst stuffing your face with free food.
The competition will be split into three categories - "Bald and Obnoxious", "Hammered on Cheap Plonk" and "Patronizing Cretin", with the winner from each group going forward to a final and massive "Shout Off".
BBC employees have been banned from entering, as they have been considered to have an unfair advantage, whilst most professional chefs have refused to take part.
Even Gordon Ramsay, not known for his shy and retiring nature stated:
"I've F*****g got no F*****g chance against those F*****g BBC F*****g halfwits!"
