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Funny satire stories about idiots

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Stop answering my butt-dials, idiots!

Funny story: Stop answering my butt-dials, idiots!

In a text message to everyone on his contact list, Ruben DeMarco of New Milford New Jersey has a strong message that captures and explains his frustration. "So, I'm at the movies with Kate and my cell phone buzzes" Ruben explained "who the he...

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The sound of uh huh uh huh uh huh accompanying themrussians themrussians analysis

Funny story: The sound of uh huh uh huh uh huh accompanying themrussians themrussians analysis

Today electors meet to confirm the winner of the 2016 presidential election--or will they? The latest: Mr. Podesta states Mr. Putin is responsible with his sinister, if not evil, actions to turn Mr. Trump into a "lapdog." Why? Beyond interferen...

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Missed Flight Labeled As Blunder Of The Century

Funny story: Missed Flight Labeled As Blunder Of The Century

TUSCON, AZ- Alec Silchuk, an assistant golf pro at the prestigious Tuscon Country Club, has apparently missed his flight in what officials are calling the "blunder of the century". The dim-witted buffoon reportedly spent the next 18 hours in and o...

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Bigot Parents Are Having Yet Another Baby

Funny story: Bigot Parents Are Having Yet Another Baby

Chepenseki, TENN.-- Local morons , Roy and Teri Rosheen, have had yet another child. According to local sources, the couple plans on naming the creation something "unique" like "Unique" or "Randy". The precious and soon to be dimwitted child is t...

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After Tragedy, Townspeople Turn Into "Big Bunch of Jerks"

A gas plant explosion in the small town of Highwater, KS is the type of thing that can bring out the best in people. They band together, help each other, generally pitch in and get through the crisis. Highwater had a different idea, however. T...

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Eight Crazy, Dangerous, Nutcase Numbskulls Who Deserve Stoning

Funny story: Eight Crazy, Dangerous, Nutcase Numbskulls Who Deserve Stoning

In recent days, weeks, and months, there have been some outrageous displays of total insanity, stupidity, arrogance, fraud, and even murder and mass murder, bringing back the need for throwing rocks at people. Just like in Biblical times. None of these events or people are funny. They're very unfunny. And although we can't actually throw rocks at others, dark satire's always been a good way to sli...

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Gun Nuts Promote More Mass Shootings As A Way Of Stimulating Gun Sales

Funny story: Gun Nuts Promote More Mass Shootings As A Way Of Stimulating Gun Sales

Gun toting crazies, flush with a victory over the US Government and common sense in general with their defeat of all gun bills, have decided to keep on a roll and create more gun sales by stimulating more mass shootings. Observing that the sale of gu...

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Cretin wins mayoral race

Labour candidate, Alan Cretin won the Sparrow-on-the-Wold mayoral by-election last night. Cretin, a former Miss World and the first person to legally breastfeed a Stoat, thrashed second-placed Tory winner Cardinal Ken "Mincepie" McGregor. Fellow s...

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"I'm Proud Of Being An Idiot!" Says Defiant Idiot

Funny story: "I'm Proud Of Being An Idiot!" Says Defiant Idiot

Barcelona - Spain:- A man caused quite a stir in this cosmopolitan Catalan city this morning, as he paraded around the city's central square, Placa Espana, wearing a placard which stated: 'I AM AN IDIOT AND PROUD OF IT!' A group of curious onlo...

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Study finds that Congress is Getting Dumber: You don't Even want to know about the People who Keep Voting them into Office

Funny story: Study finds that Congress is Getting Dumber: You don't Even want to know about the People who Keep Voting them into Office

A recent study has found that unbeknownst to the rest of us the US Congress is actually getting dumber. Who knew? The study was conducted by the Society of Dysfunctional Ping Pong Players, who studied the last 20 years of Congressional Represen...

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Millions of idiots expected to go blind Monday

Funny story: Millions of idiots expected to go blind Monday

San Francisco CA - Scientists predict that millions of rebellious idiotic, rude, young adults will be blinded Monday. Dr. Smerve Leude of the Whackover Institute told reporters that the eclipse of the sun Monday would not be total. Damaging rays wo...

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Stargate Universe! - a Rant on Parliament and Politics

Funny story: Stargate Universe! - a Rant on Parliament and Politics

Perhaps it's me, but today I woke up wondering if I was living in a parallel universe somehow different from the universe inhabited by the fruitloops that frequent Number 10 and the Houses of Parliament. After tripping over the cat and regaining my composure I turned the TV news on and lo, I discovered I was here on planet earth after all even if all these non-elected nutters are not. Yes, u...

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Ricky Gervais rules out return to Golden Globes - but is the new host lined up?

Funny story: Ricky Gervais rules out return to Golden Globes - but is the new host lined up?

Ricky Gervais has vowed never to present the Golden Globes again after his third stint was given a lukewarm reception by critics. Gervais caused outrage last year with a string of near the knuckle jokes at the expense of Hollywood royalty. With G...

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An explanation of the financial crisis, for morons

Funny story: An explanation of the financial crisis, for morons

These days, the media is full of depressing but thrilling news about the financial crisis. It is regularly implied that we are all doomed, that banks will fail, governments will fall, and nothing will work in the future. But somehow the world continues turning. It's enough to make one hit oneself over the head with a brick and yell, "What does it mean? What does it all mean???" So here, in the...

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All off at Religion Station

Funny story: All off at Religion Station

We've all been there. Happily blundering in the dark believing that there's no God and that pure random chance and basic high school physics created the universe and all life within it, in it's glorious diversity. Then suddenly it hits us. Life is like a train, and we can stay on those single tracks blindly following science, or we could get off at Religion Station. The great thing about...

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All aboard the atheist train!

Funny story: All aboard the atheist train!

The current fad amongst the mentally lazy is that of atheism. It has been claimed by the BAPS - British Atheist Propaganda Society that it is 'cool' to be an atheist. Once the domain of the faux intellectuals, now it is the topic of hot debate on ITVs 'Loose Women'! It is impossible to prove a universal negative, yet atheism - the belief that there is no God, makes just that wacky claim! Foolis...

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Shakespeare plays were actually written by Tara Palmer Tomkinson

Funny story: Shakespeare plays were actually written by Tara Palmer Tomkinson

In a major interview in a major newspaper today, it was revealed that the entire works of William Shakespeare were actually ghost written by philanthropist, socialite and Dean of the Faculty of Make Up, Lipstick and over-priced Fashion at University...

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More young people aspiring to be idiots

Teens nowadays are looking more and more toward idiocy as a viable career choice. "It's like those reality shows" stated one teen who only referred to himself as "The Retention." "You can't be smart and be on those, yet look at the money those pe...

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Breaking news…

National Park Service Rewrites Statue of Liberty Plaque

"Give me your strong, your rich, your workers yearning to breathe capitalism. Send no homeless, impoverished, or those seeking refuge from MS-13 to me. I want no trash to tarnish our golden door."
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