Written by Laura Holliday

Saturday, 13 April 2019

A person who has successfully managed to avoid HBO’s cinematic masterpiece Game of Thrones is sadly caught out with only two days remaining before the final season begins.

The woman, who prefers not to be named, accidentally walked in on her friend watching the series during a particularly climactic scene in which the two principal characters, Jon Snow and Daenerys Targaryen, consummate their relationship. She was unable to take her eyes off the TV for the duration of the scene, but only once the credits rolled did she realize she had unknowingly watched Game of Thrones.

“I was shocked,” the woman admitted. “I have a degree in French cinema and I was certain that this was 1950s film noir. The cynicism, the sex, the low lighting — it was all far too similar.” The woman also added that she was disappointed in herself for succumbing to the lure of popular culture, but has assured reporters that she will retain her edgy and complex personality despite this minor hiccup.

She has no plans to watch the rest of the series when it airs next week but will pick it up around 6 years later once it is considered acceptable. She is currently making her way through Friends, Lost and Breaking Bad.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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